


maybe i just want to be yours

by sorrowfulhan (softsmilesandbrokenhearts)



Category: GOT7
Genre: Anal Sex, Bottom Jackson Wang, Boys In Love, Canon Compliant, Established Relationship, M/M, Makeup, Top Park Jinyoung (GOT7)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-29
Updated: 2020-05-29
Packaged: 2021-03-03 00:08:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,337
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24445573
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/softsmilesandbrokenhearts/pseuds/sorrowfulhan
Summary: jackson tries and fails at not looking further down, and he looks on as jinyoung smiles, eyes creasing with peachy toned eyeshadow framing his eyes and a pretty blush on his cheeks. jackson wonders how he got so lucky, to be with someone so ethereal, in every form he takes. jackson isn’t a very religious man, but he vows to get on his knees and worship jinyoung’s like the god he is.
Relationships: Park Jinyoung/Jackson Wang
Comments: 2
Kudos: 35





	maybe i just want to be yours

today has been exhausting. tiring in a way jackson should be accustomed to, but isn’t, and he feels the tightness in his jaw and the ache in his bones in a way he hasn’t in a while. it’s nearly comeback season which means painful diets, and extensive practices, and the bone deep worry that makes him wonder if he is doing enough. giving enough to his fans and putting in the effort that ahgase deserve. jackson won’t degrade his own worth, but on nights likes these, when the lack of caffeine kicks in, he wonders. he wonders if he’s good enough, if the pain he endures and the long nights will be enough in the end. it usually is though and jackson loves it, loves it more than anything in the world, and he is grateful for all that he is given.

with that being said, he’s fucking tired and he’s barely off the plane back from hong kong, and he already feels the strange air that is seoul. it’s not his birthplace, but he feels connected to the city all the same, and when he breathes in the dirty pollution and takes in the noise, so loud, even in the dead of night, he knows he is home. 

and that where he is headed, back home to his apartment, where he will feel the comforting warmth and the low lights. he’ll get to sleep in his nice, big bed, and then think of nothing for a brief, lovely few hours. 

he then thinks of pale, pink skin, and of toothy grins, and the way home could really be wherever he is. it’s easy to fall into thoughts of jinyoung, the younger boy’s bright laughs and comforting presence, one of the things that keeps jackson going. but that is neither here nor there, so with a reluctant smirk, he gently, but firmly shoves those thoughts else where.

he takes out his keys and clicks them into the lock, thinking of the safe, quiet warmth of his bed and eating nothing but noodle cups for the next few days. he understand the futility of this, but sometimes jackson likes to dream. as he enters the room, something seems off, and he tugs his sunglasses off, to peer wearily into the room. what he finds is a dull light shining through his bedroom door, and his sleep deprived mind aches as it tries to figure out what is wrong.

then it hits him, a slow sensation up his spine and a heavy beat to his heart. jinyoung is here.

despite himself, he feels his cheeks stretch into a grin and he tosses his bag down, exhaustion pushed to the back of his mind.

“jinyoungie?” his voice is hoarse from use, and he winces at the sharp pain that crawls in his throat, but it makes it worth it when jinyoung responds, voice low and warm.

“give me a minute jackson!” it’s strange, how dependent jackson has become on his boyfriend, how he can barely go a week without seeing him, before a steady, cold feeling arises in his chest and begs him to go back home. he loves him so much, and it’s strange to him that he can have what he does, the fame and support from all around the world, and still have this. he doesn’t deserve it, and certainly doesn’t understand how he got it, but he is eternally grateful for it anyways.

jackson gets so lost in his thoughts that he fails to notice the door click open, and when he hears a gentle cough, his head whips upward, something he immediately regrets as the pain in his neck throbs.

“hey sseunie? can you come here please?” jinyoung asks, and jackson finds himself listening without thought, his legs moving on autopilot as he takes in the shadows on jinyoung’s face.

as he gets closer he notices it, and he halts, eyes widening with a gasp escaping his throat. it’s unnoticeable at first, the darkness of the room hiding it rather well, but as his eyes catch on the bright pink of jinyoung’s lips, he can’t breathe. 

jackson wonders if he is imagining it, if one of his late night fantasies somehow got superimposed onto reality, and he isn’t seeing what he is seeing. but as he steps closer, feet heavy and breath almost uneven, he catches the pretty shine on jinyoung’s upper lip, and he knows he’s not.

jinyoung visibly smirks, and wraps a hand around his wrist, and he tugs jackson into the bedroom, a gentle sway to his hips. jackson follows, of course he does, and he tries to control himself when he sees the innocuous bag lying on the bed.

“jackson? what’s wrong?” it’s an innocent question, and it throws jackson off for a moment, unable to tell if jinyoung is serious or not. but then he catches the concern in his eyes, and the purse to his lips, and he realizes something. he doesn’t know what he is doing to jackson. jinyoung is an oblivious tease.

jackson shakes his head and smiles, lightheaded as he speaks, and watches as jinyoung perches himself on the bed, big eyes focused on him.

“i missed you.” he lets out and then slaps a hand to his mouth, because that’s not what he meant to say. he was suppose to tell him something more obnoxious, cheesy even, and less genuine, but his emotions got the best of him. jinyoung seems to think so as well, as his eyes widen and then narrow as he peers up into jackson’s face. jackson takes the opportunity to take an eyeful, and he stares longingly at jinyoung’s hair, freshly washed and curly at the edges. jackson tries and fails at not looking further down, and he looks on as jinyoung smiles, eyes creasing with peachy toned eyeshadow framing his eyes and a pretty blush on his cheeks. jackson wonders how he got so lucky, to be with someone so ethereal, in every form he takes. jackson isn’t a very religious man, but he vows to get on his knees and worship jinyoung’s like the god he is.

“oh!” jinyoung suddenly exhales, a small chuckle escaping his lips, and jackson watches them, vaguely frantic as jinyoung’s runs his tongue over his bottom lip. jackson wonders if a streak of pink now lies on jinyoung’s tongue, and his chest aches from the brute force of want that crashes into him. jackson wonders if asking jinyoung to stain him pink with his lips would be too much to ask. if asking jinyoung to ruin him would be too bold, as if jinyoung didn’t know the pull he had on jackson.

“can you help me with something?” it’s a strange question following jackson obvious leering, but jackson nods, eagerly, and he smiles when jinyoung laughs again, like crystal bells ringing in the air, light and happy. jackson is in love with jinyoung’s laugh, needs to hear it in order to breathe right.

“of course nyoungie, what do you need?” jinyoung smiles at the nickname, and jackson watches desperately as jinyoung stretches out, and his sweater raises ever so slightly. jackson catches sight of a strip of lace, baby pink and flowery, and jackson wants to die. he looks back up at jinyoung who seems oblivious as usual, but his lips are cocked in an amused smirk and his eyes have a devious shine to them.

jackson looses some semblance of self control and he slides in between the fit of jinyoung’s legs, grinning when he feels the solid bulge of jinyoung’s erection press against his thigh.

it’s gratifying in way to know he isn’t the only one caught deep in this, that jinyoung is just as affected by him and what they have.

“what are you wearing baby?” jackson’s voice is hoarse from use, hoarse from his never ending love and lust for the man in front of him. he drags his thumbs upward and beneath jinyoung’s sweater, and he feels the drag of the delicate fabric against his skin.

jinyoung answers with a delighted, dirty grin and he leans forward until his lips just barely brush against jackson’s ear. jackson lets out a gasp, and his hands wrap around the younger’s waist, as heavy puffs of breath fall onto his ear. instead of saying anything though, jinyoung chuckles and it takes jackson a second to feel the hot, wet warmth of jinyoung licking his ear. jinyoung pulls back with dark eyes, fierce and hungry, and jackson wants. jackson wants so bad, and he hears a shaky whine leave his lips, high pitched and insatiable.

“do you think this will look better if i put a gloss over it?” jinyoung asks suddenly, pulling away to hold up a sparkly tube of lipgloss, and jackson forces himself to focus. it’s a simple question, and the answer should be relatively easy to find, but jackson needs to see first hand, to make sure. he tells jinyoung so, and he receives a warm smile in return, one that simultaneously makes jackson heart clench and his dick throb. the duality of park jinyoung at its finest.

jackson longs both to take pictures of the man in front of him, to savor this rare side to jinyoung, him in heavy, pretty makeup, and the lace that jinyoung refuses to acknowledge. and also to ruin him, drag his stubble against his boyfriend’s face until the makeup is smeared and he is gasping, calling his name as he comes. he wants so many things, and has so many questions but they can wait, he doesn’t dare waste his time with jinyoung. not when it’s so precious.

“okay, but i’m not getting up, so you’ll have to be my eyes for me.” if the obvious hardness pressed against jackson body wasn’t a clue of itself, the deep husky quality of jinyoung’s voice would be. jackson watches with wide eyes, breathless, as jinyoung gingerly applies the gloss to his lips. he’s close enough to see the multicolored shine to it, the way it makes his lips fuller, more put out. jinyoung rubs this lips together, and jackson desperate and needy, lets out a gasp. he is honored that he gets to see this, that jinyoung will show this side of himself. it makes jackson shaky and giddy with never ending love.

suddenly jinyoung smirks at him, a mean thing with an evil twinkle in his eye, and jackson hears himself audibly gulp in a combination of fear and lust.

“i take it you like it?” it’s a cocky remark, self assured and bright with tension, and jackson nods frantically, fingers gripping into the soft supple flesh of jinyoung’s thighs. jackson loves jinyoung in every form, but to see him confident and unafraid, is something jackson can never get enough of.

“of course. i love you no matter what you look like.” and god, it shouldn’t fit the mood as well as it does, not with the two of them growing increasingly hard and desperate, but jackson grins shakily and he sees jinyoung smile back, eyes warm and fond. jackson loves him, loves him with his entire being, and he wonders how is he so continuously lucky enough to have this.

jinyoung smiles, a shiny pink against white teeth, achingly warm and bright.

“but it looks good on you.” jackson takes a moment to really look, take in the full face of makeup, jinyoung’s relaxed posture, and easy smile. he is filled with the urge to kiss him senseless, and jackson considers it, taking one more look at the pretty hue of his boyfriends lips before he leans down, and attaches his lips to jinyoung’s neck instead.

jinyoung moans, low and warm, and jackson wraps a hand around the slim waist to place it against the small of jinyoung’s back. he licks down jinyoung’s throat, and grins at the tiny groans escaping the younger’s mouth. he bites down on the soft skin surrounding the collarbone, and is rewarded with jinyoung’s hips bucking upward to grind against his own.

“god, sseun-ah your mouth.” jackson takes great satisfaction in the whine that escapes jinyoung, and he inhales the comforting scent surrounding him, as his hips grind downward, slow and filthy. 

“you’re so pretty jinyoungie.” he whispers into the heated silence, and he watches as a red blush flushes jinyoung’s face and makes him laugh, high pitched and obnoxious, tiny little wheezes coming from the man. jackson drags his hands down to the hem of jinyoung’s sweater, and he smiles giddily. “can i take this off of you?” jinyoung gives him a considering look, before nodding, the flush dragging down to his neck.

jackson peels off the soft sweater and leers down at the sculpted body beneath him. jinyoung has always been fit, muscles pleasantly lean and strong in a way that makes jackson insatiable, but it is pale in comparison to the body that jinyoung has now. jackson isn’t shallow, doesn’t dare think that what they have is purely physical, but as a former athlete, he is very much appreciative of how his boyfriend looks. he is still lean, long legs still present and ever the more sensual to the thickened arms and sculpted chest of the younger. filming in dramas does something to jinyoung, enables him to work out more, show off the body he so often hides, and jackson loves it. jackson loves this new addition, and jackson knows that even when jinyoung is old and wrinkly, he’ll find that just as appealing.

jackson makes an appreciative noise and jinyoung smiles sweetly up at him, extending his body in an arch, showing off. he doesn’t complain though as he traces the firm lines of the body below him, and the way the thin lace peeks out even more, a tantalizing taste of what’s to come. 

“can i take these of baby?” jackson’s voice is shot, achingly deep and scratchy, and it must do something for jinyoung because a low groan escapes him, and he nods shyly, canting his hips up into jackson’s waiting hands.

eagerly, jackson peels the jeans off and down jinyoung’s legs, and stares as the underwear gets drag a bit down, revealing pale, soft skin that’s just for him. the younger’s legs look infinitely long, and shaped to perfection, and jackson trails his hands shakily up them, until his hands brush against the delicate pink of the underwear beneath him.

“you’re so pretty jinyoung-ah. can’t wait to fuck you.” jinyoung turns red at his statement, and reaches up to grab his shoulders with a hoarse laugh. jackson leans into it, kissing the collarbone beneath him, and jinyoung takes the opportunity to film them, leaving jackson breathless.

the picture above him is lewd, filthy in all the best ways. the head of jinyoung’s cock barely peaks out from the lace around it, and if jackson looks closely he can see how wet he is, leaking onto his stomach. jin young’s things straddles his waist, and he cants his hips up to grind pathetically until jinyoung sits down firmer, and stops him with a searching look.

“who said anything about fucking me?” jinyoung arches an eyebrow up, and jackson is given the impression of a prey right before it’s captured. he gulps, and watches as jinyoung crawls forward towards him, eyes dark and intent on his own. he lifts his hips away from jackson, and jackson whines, too far gone to be embarrassed by the sounds he is making. when jinyoung sits back down on his lap, hips already grinding down, he moans and reaches out to grip jinyoung’s arms.

he thinks about jinyoung’s comment, rather confused as to why not, jinyoung likes be fucked and jackson figures tonight was one of those nights. jackson wants to comment on the obvious, acknowledge how feminine his boyfriend looks, but he stops with a realization that it doesn’t matter. what jinyoung wears or looks like doesn’t dictate who tops in this relationship of theirs, and were jackson not so far gone he’d speak on it, desperate to prove a point. this thing of jinyoung’s that he so graciously showed to jackson has nothing to do with power play, and more so with jinyoung liking the way it feels. and jinyoung chose to show this, to be vulnerable and yet decidedly not at the same time. it warms jackson heart with an intensity he can’t contain, and he presses kisses to jinyoungs chest, hoping his message gets across. 

it clearly does when jinyoung softens minutely, and smiles down at him, shy and brazen all at once.

jinyoung’s hands start trailing against his chest, the delicious drag of fabric making me grain, and he arches up, heat flushing down low in his stomach, and he opens his eyes again to look at jinyoung with desperation. jinyoung smiles sweetly and trails a hand lightly down to rub against his crotch, and he feels his cock throb with need.

“what do you want sseun-ah?” the question is simple, teasing, and so obviously not a question. jackson knows tonight will only go one way, and what jinyoung really wants him to do is ask for it. not long before jackson wouldn’t have been able to, so set on this idea that in this type of relationship, one person tops constantly. jackson never pictured himself taking it, nor asking for it, but here he is whiny with need and so full of love for his boyfriend. and so he says it, a smile breaking through his lips when is comes out with aegyo edging it’s lines.

“please fuck me, want you to take me jinyoungie.” it comes out in a gasp, and jackson nearly cries with pleasure when jinyoung slips a hand into his pants, and circles lithe fingers around his length, and tugs hot and quick.

jinyoung smirks, and leans down, mapping his lips agaisnt the beating pulse of jackson’s throat, and bites down, tongue soothing the pain as he pulls away. jackson wants to see the mark that jinyoung left on him, pink and wet, and he tries to get up, only for jinyoung to push him back down with a laugh. jackson groans, noisy in a way he only gets with jinyoung and he reaches for his shirt to tug it off, jinyoung captures his wrists before he can, and places them above his head with an amused noise. 

“keep your clothes on.” jackson’s head goes empty as he considered that with a giddy grin, and it feels strangely vulnerable, being clothed while jinyoung is above him naked and imposing. or mostly naked, he considers, staring at the darkened spot on the lacy underwear covering his boyfriend. as jinyoung manhandles him onto his knees, he wonders how jinyoung got them, if he walked into the stroke and bought them, brazenly confident and unworried about the press. it’s an interesting thought, exciting in its unlikeliness, and he places it aside to give more thought when his boyfriend isn’t currently peeling his sweatpants down his legs.

slick fingers trace his hole and he arches his back, and looks back, ignoring the ache in his neck to grin at jinyoung happily. jinyoung rolls his eyes, and licks his lips again, distracting jackson enough to not realize anything until a finger slips inside of him, achingly hot. 

“did you do this when you were gone? did you miss my fingers?” its phrased as a casual question, but jackson can hear the heat behind it, and he goes to answer before jinyoung crooks his finger deliciously and jackson groans lowly, and pushes back against it wanting more. jinyoung is kind, and inches another one in, scissoring slowly, as he waits for jackson’s answer.

“yes.” his answer is hesitant and unnaturally shy, and jinyoung’s fingers pause for a moment before starting again harder and quick, pressing up against his prostate with each movement. it’s sweet and jackson forgot how good this could feel, so he when he feels the building pressure his arms loose their grip on the silky sheets, and he falls down, ass arches further in the air.

“that’s so hot jackson.” jinyoung manages, voice dark and heady, and jackson can feel the moment he leans forward, soft lace scratching his backside, and a warm, solid erection settling between his legs to grind.

“come on, give me another.” jackson asks, and he’s not begging, but it’s a near thing, and jinyoung complies with another annoying chuckle that makes jackson want to smile and hit him at the same time.

jinyoung barely gets the chance to stretch in his third finger before jackson pulls away, and wiggles his ass, impatient and ready for more.

“fuck me jinyoung. i know you want to.” jackson teases, his voice lilting upwards and he peers backwards to watch jinyoung tug his cock out of his underwear, and slick it up, until it’s dripping with lube.

jinyoung’s hands land on his hips, and he has no chance to complain about how empty he feels because, jinyoung begins to slide in, the burn just the right side of painful, and he sighs happily and lays his head back down, a hand reaching back to land on jinyoung’s. the thick stretch of it is something jackson hasn’t felt for too long, and it sends pleasure rocking down to his toes when jinyoung rocks upward just right. he tightens his grip on jinyoung’s hand, and is pleased when jinyoung gets the memo and begins to move, hips rocking back and forth at a pace that has jackson gasping for air. 

“ah jinyoung, forgot how good you were at this.” jackson manages to get out, his other hand gripping into the sheets and pulling, the familiar ache making him boneless. jinyoung answers in a breathy moan, which jackson shouldn’t find cute, but he does and makes a little noise to appreciate it, which makes jinyoung speed up, thrust harsh in way that jackson and jinyoung both love.

suddenly jinyoung slips out of him, and jackson cries out disappointed, hips rocking back into nothing, as he grinds agaisnt the soft sheets beneath him. jinyoung picks him up and pulls him into his lap, cock nestling back where it belongs, and oh this is so much better.

jackson places his hands on jinyoung’s shoudlers and cries out, when jinyoung begins to thrust up again, hitting his prostate relentlessly. jinyoung squeezes his ass pointedly, and jackson nods, and begins to move up and down, grinning at the way jinyoung’s eyes do dark as he leans back and watches jackson, breathy little moans still escaping him. 

jackson bounces up and down, desperate as the growing waves inside his stomach grow, and jinyoung’s hands dig into his sides, bruising in a way that jackson knows he’ll apologize about later, but jackson doesn’t mind. he wants jinyoung to mark him up, claim him as his. 

every movement of his brings out a new noise from jinyoung’s lips, and this is so raw, beautiful in a way that sex shouldn’t be, and he feels himself, midst his impeding orgasm, fall in love with jinyoung even more.

“i love you.” he says suddenly, and watches as jinyoung’s face freezes and then a sharp cry escapes his lips, louder than is should be, and hotter than anything jackson could have imagined.

jinyoung comes, comes so hard, and jackson revels in the hot pulsing inside him, and it spurs him on, as he relentlessly moves his hips, on the edge and so ready to fall off it. jinyoung reaches for it, eyes hazy and almost pained as overstimulation sets in, and he wraps a hand around jackson’s cock, chanting his name over and over again.

“sseunie come for me.” jinyoung whispers brokenly, the moan that escapes his mouth is not human, and the last thing he sees is jinyoung lean in to his him, hot and hungry, nails digging into his scalp.

it crashes over him suddenly and powerfully, coming unraveled and his movements become wild and broken, jinyoung’s name escaping his lips over and over, as he comes, white streaks covering both jackson black shirt and jinyoungs sculpted chest.

he comes back to life a moment, a century alter, and he is laying flat in the bed, with jinyoung on his chest, legs pressed against his own. jackson looks down and sees the lacy addition is gone and jackson briefly mourns its loss before he turns to jinyoungs and kisses him softly.

“love you jinyoung.” he murmurs tiredly, and looks at the mess that covers jinyoungs face. the sweat made jinyoungs eyeshadow run down, and it’s reminiscent of tears, pretty pink and beautiful. jinyoung’s lipstick is nearly gone, and jackson wonders if it lays smeared on him now, and he hopes so, giddy even in his exhaustion. jinyoung smiles back at him, and kisses his nose with a little noise, a tired and happy him, and jackson has never felt better.

“i missed you jackson. i love you too.” jinyoung whispers, and it’s so rare to get such open, soft affection like this from jinyoung, and so jackson saves this moment, takes a mental picture to remember it forever. jackson grins and kisses him again, and maps his boyfriends map with his tongue, tasting him and the fresh toothpaste scent that lays in his mouth. he frowns at that and frowns, pouting half heartedly.

“next time let me kiss you before you brush your teeth. i don’t want to taste toothpaste.” jinyoung laughs at that and pulls him closer, tucking his head beneath jackson’s.

“that’s gross sseunie.”

“mmm you can never be gross, i love how you taste.” the blush that covers jinyoung’s face is impressive and worth the slap to the chest he gets for it. but hi young is smiling and he is too, so he doesn’t take offense, and curls closer to his boyfriend. 

as he falls asleep, exhaustion taking over him, sleeping next to his favorite person in the world, he’s never felt more at home.

**Author's Note:**

> my first got7 fic! yay! i love the idea of people cross dressing (or just wearing more feminine things) but still being in charged lol. i love jinson and they are so soft and cute, and deserve better than half baked porn lol. it’s hard to write sexy stuff yikes. hope it’s okay either way, i plan i writing more considered stories on them so this will not be the last. thanks for reading and hopefully you enjoyed :)


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